I am in the rarified and somewhat unpredictable space between learning of the death of a friend and heading to his memorial gathering this weekend. It is an uncomfortable space, but blessed. The superficial, while it cannot be completely ignored, is at least acknowledged for what it is. I get to remember very clearly, what is important to me. And so, friends, I share with you a post that might only happen in a time like this. I invite you to slow it down, because as usual, the slower you go, the more you can take in. This one is in the Name of Love, Becky
Just Another Name for Love
“I’m giving you (fill in the blank) because I love you.”
What would you fill in? Flowers, chocolate, kisses, a new car, a shell from the sea, a leaf, a diamond ring? Or something less pleasant, a beating, consequences, a hard time, a breakup.
Even before we are born, swimming deliciously in our mother’s juice, we have started to build our own definition of Love. It is based on the definitions around us and shaped by our own experiences and interpretations.
The word itself may be one of the most overused and have the most meanings of any word, EVER.
In today’s culture there is an emotion that is often thrown in under the umbrella of Love. It is shame.
Shame is a very common and effective tool for socialization within a family, community or culture. It is used for training acceptable behaviour. Shame says that Love is conditional upon a certain behaviour. When you behave a certain way, you are loveable.
WHAT IF your definition of Love, included, without exception, the quality of unconditional?
How would that feel in your own body? Can you feel the sigh of relief that unconditional love brings to your life? Can you feel the peace it brings to your family?
Maybe it’s time to consciously create your own definition of Love. What is the feeling that cannot be described? How would you like Love to feel? Warm, expansive, safe, understanding, accepting, creative, comforting, peaceful, joyful. Would you add words like challenging or teaching without harkening back to older days of punishment? Does your Love have you laughing or smiling? Are you singing or quiet?
Take a moment to create your feeling of Love in your body. Imagine yourself in the most beautiful scene in the world (or out of it) with the perfect gentle light and sound to accompany. With each breath, allow that feeling to expand in your body. Allow the feeling of love to reach every cell. Let if travel with wisdom through the water pathways of your body. With each breath out, you feel the understanding and healing of this love.
Love expands from there. Now add your dearest friends and family to your definition, and EVERYONE is absolutely bathed in love. Can you imagine that? Take a few minutes to be with your family and friends in your space of love.
Imagine a love space that holds your entire town, nation and then world. One candle from your beautiful heart, holds without strain or depletion, the entire planet in love. Can you imagine that?
Because if you can imagine it, you begin to create it.
Now bring it back to yourself, back into your body, and ask Love to stay. This feeling that you’ve taken time to tend and strengthen can now feed you. Your expanded definition of Love is real, and reflects through you.
You may find that within minutes of re-entering your daily life, you feel upset or angry. You may feel the injustice of the world and people that greet you from your sacred space. The physical world and your inner world are working to meet each other. This is where is patience and awareness become wisdom.
Keep your definition of love clear in your heart. Use that feeling to respond to the situations that arise around you. Remind yourself regularly how it feels. Forgive yourself when you feel your actions don’t reflect your new definition of love. You are learning to navigate with the most responsive and innovative power in the universe.
It takes some time to develop new skills and understanding. But as you do, you begin to teach the people around you, so that they too can re-define and expand Love to be more than it has ever been. You can know, even if they are not quite ready to hear you say,
“I am giving you this Love because I love you.”
Check it Out
What a brilliant woman and her story can transform you.
“There is only one happiness in this life, to love and be loved.” George Sand
Share this with the people you love
Are you ready to expand your definition of Love?